You Can Brett this Drama is Favre from Over

Having my roots in Green Bay, I'll tell you right off the bat: I have a man-crush on Brett Favre. If you came here seeking un-biased, objective reporting on the current state of the Packers organization, then you best mosey on back to ESPN.com.

It's clear that many people are sick of the media coverage and think Favre should stay retired but I say bring it on, this is the makings of high drama. A beloved veteran quarterback trying to get back into the game, an ego-driven manager bent on ushering in a new era to call his own, behind the scenes back-dealing, roaring masses...Shakespeare himself couldn't make this stuff up, I'm telling ya!

The entire nation is clearly captivated by this story. If Green Bay is the stage, then we as Madisonians have front row seats to the show! If we didn't have this saga to talk about around the water cooler, what else would be talking about right now? The weather? Weekend plans? Dare I say it...work?!?!

I hope all of these shenanigans culminate into a climax where Brett Favre and Aaron Rodgers compete in some kind of quarterbacking contest for the starting position this season. To seem legitimate, the event would have to include your typical quarterback dueling staples such as throwing a football through a tire hanging from a tree, throwing at cardboard cutouts of players at various distances across the field and some kind of Eliminator-like obstacle course.

Although I believe Brett Favre would excel in these feats of strength and skill, the events should still be back-loaded in his favor. Challenges that would adhere to Favre's strengths could include heaving the football the farthest into double coverage, precision shuttle passing and in the event of a tie-breaker, a grizzled beard growing contest.

This mini-QB Olympics could be televised to a national audience. Think of the ratings! All the proceeds from commercials could go towards charity (or possibly a new offensive tackle) either way it should be exciting to watch.

The bottom line is that professional sports exist to entertain us and no one does that better than Brett Favre, on or off the field. I hope you come back, Brett, and to take it one step further; I hope you play for another 27 years and retire when you're 65 like the rest of us working stiffs.

A kid can dream, right?

I'm glad you said grizzled-beard-growing contest and not handlebar-moustache-growing contest because Rodgers has really been working hard in the off season. – JD, Madison (07-18-08)

Maybe Brett Favre could compete in a crying contest. We all know he is great at that, too. – Matt, Sun Prairie (07-18-08)

I'm tired of hearing about Favre threatening to quit quitting. Maybe he'll text us all and tell us the true answer but damn, it's pretty old by now. – Enscorcelled, Middleton (07-18-08)

Everybody trashing Favre on a personal level needs to understand how ridiculous it is to suggest Favre should live his life in accordance with what some random person named Matt from Sun Prairie, WI deems acceptable. Favre needs to live with his decision for the rest of his life while his decision has absolutely no impact whatsover on some random person named Matt from Sun Prairie. Favre should do what he wants to do. – Jeff, Madison (07-18-08)

I agree with Jeff. Trying to understand Brett Favre is like trying to understand God. There's no way that we could comprehend his plan, we should just feel lucky that for a brief time his plan included us. – Tom Jane, Madison (07-18-08)

Well, I love Brett Favre too! If he doesn't come back, HE ALWAYS HAS HIS ACTING CAREER! Who wouldn't want to see him on the big screen!=) Ben great article!!!!! – abbey, madison (07-18-08)

I, actually, always try and live my life in accordance with Matt from Sun Prarie, Jeff in Madison, if that is your real name, Bart Simpson! – Chris, Minneapolis (07-18-08)

What's gotten lost in all of this hoopla is the fact that, up until his interview with Fox News, Favre had been communicating solely via text message. Which begs the question: Does Favre use emoticons? – P-Funk, In-my-pants-olis, MN (07-18-08)

Tom Jane, I totally agree with you. Favre is God. As an atheist, however, I can only conclude that Favre doesn't actually exist. – Rick Nebman, The Land of Ten Thousand Flakes (Just to clarify, I'm referring to (07-18-08)

My favorite planet is the sun, always has been. – Harry Caray, Chicago, IL (07-19-08)

Everyone knows that Brett Favre doesn't cry...he is simply lubricating his eyes so he can throw farther and more accurately. – Ben W, Madison, WI (07-21-08)

What is "Shuttle Passing?" Shovel Pass maybe? Or like throwing Shuttle Cocks from a badminton set? Anyway, Favre should come back, but have to wear a different number and the packers still get to retire #4 during the first game. This is the only real solution. – William Clay, Madison, WI (07-21-08)

Ben, the two women who write blogs are WAAAAAY hotter than you. Don't get me wrong, you're hot, just not that hot. – Hank Venture, Madison, WI (07-21-08)